I guess some people might say I'm accident prone, clumsy, blundering, uncoordinated.... I prefer to call it unenlightened..it sort of implies that at one time I was and now?, well, now I'm not...like something happened to cause this affliction. You might even feel sorry for me, sympathize? Maybe? Lord knows my family doesn't. There is not one ounce of compassion wasted here when Queen Momma has one of her mishaps. It might be because they occur so frequently or maybe they just don't care;, it could also be that I, unlike all of them, am very tolerant of pain, rarely complain and require little to no coddling, not that I would get it if I did!
It had been a particularly overwhelming, overbearing, overdose-o'-family type of weekend....not to mention that Prince Charming, who travels quite often, had been home for a couple of weeks in a row, throwing a wrench into Our (the teen inhabitants of my Castle & I) somewhat manageable, almost productive, okay totally random routine (how dare he!) causing utter chaos and confusion with every step. Now, come Monday, there were multiple people getting ready at the same time, that time being inhumane and impossible for an oblivious teenage boy to begin with (of which you are already aware if you've read my alarm clock post)! Needless to say, there was so much madness and mayhem resulting from this collision of schedules that everyone was in a tizzy when they parted ways and proceeded to their individual destinations (except for me of course because I am always calm cool and in control! LOL, no mother over 40, umm i mean 30, with 2 teenagers can ever, honestly, say that!)
In an instant I was alone....at first I was a little sad....no, that was a joke, I was ecstatic! The next 8 hours were mine and mine alone (alone being me, my dog, 3 cats, a rabbit and some fish)..... this is where I will warn you.... Never rejoice (at least not out loud or via Facebook/Twitter status) that you have a day to yourself....They are watching, They are all knowing, They will get you! .... This is also where all of you come in and frankly, must accept some of the blame.....
"Home Alone :( ...... :/ ...... :D !)"
I bragged on my statuses because naturally that's the first thing you do when you have a day to yourself, right? I mean really it's not like there's anything else that needs to be done. You see how clever, my sad face quickly turned into a huge smiley face ..... I thought I was so creative .... within micro seconds you all responded (egged me on):
"Good for you!", "Enjoy!" .... "Do the happy dance!!"
..... Hmmmmm, Happy Dance? that sounds like fun! Now remember, it was EARLY morning, I was still in my pjs (hence no shoes, an important detail) and quite frankly very giddy and perhaps a little light-headed from my newly gained solitude...... but, dance I did! I started in the kitchen and headed toward the den.....
........ Have I told you about my beautiful WROUGHT IRON kitchen chairs that stand in the path between my kitchen and my den? Apparently they are strong enough to BREAK A TOE!!!! I'm not even going to tell you what happened later that day when I started cutting up tomatoes for dinner.....let's just say I've been searching for the VooDoo doll ever since!
Here are some important links in case you ever have a "day to yourself":