(Sung to "oompa loompa from Willy Wonka")
Ooooh Ahhhh Oooooh Ahhh, All that sappy goo
You're expecting a baby, so happy for you!
Ooh Ah Ooh Ah, Ha ha and hee hee
Notice no one mentions the poop and the pee?
What do you get with the birth of baby?
Giggles and cooing and bouncing on knees
Still no one mentions the projectile gook
Or the lack of sleep and its effects on your looks
Ooh Ah Ooh Ah, then come toddler years
Crawling and walking and tantrums with tears
Gates going up and cabinets are locked
My best advice Keep the wine cellar stocked!
Then we move on to the teenager years
driving and cursing and sneaking of beers
That's when they think that they know more than you
But give them time, they will see that's not true
Ooh Ah Ooh Ah now they're young adults
Minimal damage, noone joined a cult
Yes there was screaming and slamming of doors
Hey, if that's what it takes to protect what is yours
Look for an escape, it doesn't matter where
Dream of the days you were young and alone
Hide in the closet, don't answer the phone
...............oh, that was just me?
Ooh Ah Ooh Ah, But this I'll say is true
It will all be worth it to you
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa
Oompa Loompa doompadee do!!!!!!!