Monday, September 20, 2010

Mondays can bite me! and they usually do...

(Sung beautifully to the Tune "New York, New York" too bad you can't hear me)

Start pouring the booze,
its been a long day
Right from the very start of it
Un-cork! Un-cork!
Started off with a bang
Alarm never rang
Had to rush to get son to school
Un-cork! Un-cork!
Not only was he late
It was class picture date
Bed head and sleep still in his eyes
Un-cork! Un-cork!
I wanna wake up in my Kingdom without all this *bleep*
(insert expletive of choice)
But because of Prince Charming's snore,  
this Queen doesn't sleep!
Finally arrive home
Oh crap there's the phone
Father in law is coming by!
Un-cork! Un-cork!
The dog, he's got gas,
And Hubs is being an ass
Laundry piles way over my head
Uncork! Uncork!
Oh but wait, there's more!
if you're keeping score
The upstairs toilet over-flowed 
Un-cork! Un-cork!
Why does it hit the fan all at once? The crap is knee deep. (literally)
So if you're looking for me?
I'm under the heap!
*at this time I am doing a rather impressive tap dance, Really.  too bad you can't see me*

It's gone downhill from there
Have I mentioned my hair?
I mistook the  hairspray for mousse
Uncork! Uncork!
And then there's the bruise
and in other news
My new white shirt is now tie dye
Un-cork! un-cork!
I have a headache, sore throat and fever that's very steep
But who takes care of the Mom?
I think I might weep!

*Arm to arm and kickline and Go!)

Monday morning blues, 
With me why must you screw
I won't let you get the best of me
Uncork! Uncork!
Half the day is now through
It's a little past two
I hope that is the worst of it
Un-cork! Un-cork!

I probably should have given up and crawled back into bed
But good advice is not as easily taken
as it is said

So what to do?



  1. You sing, you dance, you blog...what don't you do?
    Very impressive song writing talents!

  2. this is a mash up I can get behind. Un cork Un cork. Lurve it ! Again I bow to your greatness.

  3. I LOVE this post. It's great.

    You are v. v. brilliant.

  4. I loved this and will un-cork and un-wrap (an ice cream sandwich) right now! I shared this out on my FB!

  5. Thanks for sharing! and enjoy that ice cream sandwich! ;)

  6. Oh, this was so cute.

    And sounds like me today, thought not quite as bad.

    Just had more to do than the hours in the day.

    Only got 2 bedrooms done, and have 1 HUGE one to go.

    Un cork un cork!!


  7. It being a Monday, I accidentally deleted this comment from a blogger I greatly admire...

    The Mayor! has left a new comment on your post "Mondays can bite me! and they usually do...":

    Start spreadin' the news!!! I'm drinkin' today!!!! CHEERS to your brilliance! :-))

  8. I am always flattered when the Empress and the Mayor visit my blog and then leave such sweet comments! Thank you ;)

  9. Thanks for stopping over at Tiff's today, dear friend. It made me smile to see you there!